Letter to Somebody I Love on the Occasion of Beginning a New Task!
“I constantly experience Battle or Flight syndrome at the beginning of brand-new things, new people, brand-new methods. I feel overwhelmed by what I do not know, frustrating fear of disappointing … of not sufficing … however then I think of how in two-months time, the new will have ended up being old hat, so I squash down that Beast Worry and Monster Insufficiency and push on with typically only sheer determination and surety God is by my side. Decision to not give up and God by my side always make all the difference. Love you! You will be just what you require.”
In July, I started a new thing … A brand-new coffeehouse and pastry shop opened. I had stopped by for a cup of coffee and a muffin– and came home with a job deal! I wasn’t looking for a baking task however I ‘d constantly wanted one– in a coffee bar bakery. When I hoped and weighed about doing this, one concern kept entering your mind: Would I be sorry for that I didn’t do this in 5 years? God asked me to be truthful, to brush aside the worry of doing something so extremely brand-new but not new, something I didn’t have a paper verifying my qualifications, something I ‘d done only for household and good friends– and the answer was a company, “Yes, in five years, I would have been disappointed in myself.”
So, what’s supposed to have been a couple days a week has actually turned into 4 in the meantime while I discover brand-new things as part of someone’s All-star team. I enjoy baking but my dream isn’t to own a bakery and cafe, however it is grace to be a part of that team– as a bake … Every early morning under my clock-in name is the title, “Baker”– one word affirming I can learn new things … do new things … in brand-new places … at 58 years old …
Bread and Rolls always seemed overwhelming in my house, within my limits. Pie crusts– weren’t much worth the time since my uncertainty making, rolling and attempting to dress up always made me feel graceless. The Monster Fear walked with its companion The Monster Insufficiency.
My mentor, this wonderful store’s owner, with fantastic patience (long-suffering), assistance and motivation, has invested weeks training me to overcome. I pushed Fear of Failure aside through determination, though my legs felt like jelly and trust that I might was faith that instructions hold true: I’ve mastered bread dough, cutting and dividing dough, rolling out dough– and turning it into incredible cinnamon rolls and buns. Pie Crusts– done up prettily? Because I didn’t offer up– I have actually overcome pie crusts, too.
In this New Thing I work with active ingredients that develop into comfort … since, even baking in somebody else’s kitchen, baking somebody else’s dishes, being on another person’s all-star team … cooking/baking is never ever just baking …
Mornings measuring smooth flours,
gritty brown and sugars …
ever contagious powdered sugars,
butters, creams and milks,
chocolates, peanut butters and nutella,
blueberries, cranberries, strawberries,
lemon and orange enthusiasms
a baker’s wonderful components
developing into comfort, event
encouragement
called muffins, scones, and all sort of rolls
That Beast Worry? It’s buddy Deficiency? They existed 37 years ago when I started my very first paper job– and hoping I would get the punctuation proper in obituaries or that the city commissioner, county judge executive, even Mitch McConnell running for the Kentucky State Senate, wouldn’t think I had more decision than understanding and send me packing without an interview, 35 years back when I started graduate school and faced my very first class loaded with students, each semester with brand-new students, the office job at the university for 3 years– and now baking for a lovely bakery coffee bar– Worry and Insufficiency attempted to horn in each time, making me feel I didn’t belong, wasn’t excellent enough, capable enough, smart enough– would I be discovered?
Worry and Deficiency have actually stalked me, threatened me, left me shaking in my soul shoes all my life … however for God! My Daddy who offered me courage, the decision to stand instead of flying away … … so for the last month, I’ve been standing to mix, to present, to discover new things and new ways … standing with the One who chooses me, who tells me:
“Be strong and brave.
Do not fear or remain in fear of them,
for it is the LORD your God who chooses you.
He will not leave you or forsake you.”
~ Deuteronomy 31:6
When my boys were bit, I ‘d tell them, “Slay that Beast FEEEAAAARRRRR”– utilizing my best prophet voice … they ‘d constantly roll their eyes … I don’t think they understood I was speaking from experience. There are some things we need to tell ourselves over and over again since brand-new things occur and in the brand-new, often, we just require a suggestion of what we understand … due to the fact that the new can kind of dazzle and overwhelm, attempting to hide what we understand.
This new thing– it’s a thread weaving in with the other threads of myself. I’m still taking photos– and developing those skills. I’m still writing– there’s a book so dear to my heart coming out in September– and I’m dealing with another– however for a couple days a week, I bake … and I practice being strong and courageous in another person’s kitchen area.
Thank you, Father, for encouraging me to do this new thing … thank you for standing with me while I battle Beasts like Fear and Insufficiency … and thank you that directions are regularly true than not– in things like knitting and baking. Thank you that even at 58, there are new experiences, new usefulness, brand-new things to discover. I am so pleased that I trust you to push me through the doors you know are best and great for me– the push being your answer when I hoped about what to do … I enjoy you, Father– for always being there and providing me the best guidance. Love, your child!
Remember Me Monday: # 14 & & Linky
“I’ll make a list of God’s thoughtful dealings,
all the important things God has done that need praising,
All the generous bounties of God,
his great goodness to the family of Israel– Empathy lavished,
love elegant.”
~ Isaiah 63:7, The Message
In the Old Testament, God consistently, silently and loudly, tells his kids, “You have forgotten me!” ( Jeremiah 3:32, Ezekiel 22:12, to name a couple of). It’s a heart cry from a dad to a child who has actually forgotten all the love, all the conserving, assisting, little and big blessings– and it leaves me shocked when I recognize our Daddy, the creator of deep space, who knows things I can not start to fathom, who authors storylines that leave me amazed, enjoys all of us so much, He weeps out, “Remember Me.”
While every day is a Keep in mind God Day, I am inviting you to join me on Monday mornings to come by and remember what God has actually done for you, for your household. Maybe God sent out a cardinal darting out in front of you, as if to inform you, “I’m here,” or broke a kid’s fever after you laid all of it down at His feet in a 2 a.m. bedside vigil. Maybe He stood with you in the wait of a prayer sent, or brought someone you enjoyed to Christ. Perhaps He recovered your damaged heart, gave your courage, or you offered Him your dreams as a love offering just to have Him provide back in an inconceivable way. Perhaps God assisted you endure to bedtime after a crazy Monday, or forgive yourself for missing it with your kiddos—- Whatever it is, let’s Remember Him … in a “Remember Me Monday” love letter.
“My mouth will inform of your righteousness,
Of your redemption all the day long,
Though I know not its measure.I will come and proclaim your magnificent acts, O Sovereign Lord”
~ Psalm 71:15 -16.
Let us delight in Him by informing the stories of what He’s done! If you composed a post remembering what He’s provided for you, join the linky. If you didn’t but still want to applaud Him for what He’s done– write it in the comment area. Then go to a comment before or after yours! One of the stunning things about the blogging neighborhood is the relationships it develops!
Guidelines? Write long or short, a list or a story, consist of pictures or not. Just Remember Him and what He has actually done, and let the appreciation of your heart guide you. Let’s make Monday so Rejoice, that the goodness of God spills into the rest of the week!
